The dichotomy of Good and Evil!

I wander across the street,

Smiling at strangers whom I meet.

This is the good old me,

Can a little evil I ever be?

I ponder on the times I have gone out of my way,

To help someone from going astray.

I wonder how always I have been so polite,

And the numerous occasions I have retreated from a fight.

'Was that all worth?', I question myself

Being the goody goody fairy tale elf

As sometimes I had my moments of evil,

I wanted to be a monster, a devil.

I yearned to howl at the hypocrites,

And crush the termites who at your back bite.

I craved not to care a damn for the world,

And wished to lash out all these bindings with my sword!

Alas! Then to me it dawned,

Around my self, a hypocrisy net I had spawned.

At the outset, I used to smile at someone,

While in reality I felt like shooting them with a gun.

And then I had to abandon my pretensions,

With the good old myself I was done.

Now I am free, to express exactly what is in my mind,

Without the obligation to be always affable and kind.

This way, believe me life is so better

As you get rid of all the stored up clutter.

So the new me is an angel if you are good and all straightened,

To the devil, beware I am the Satan!!!!

Sun, sand and water.....

I was a child then, holding hands of my parents and treading my first steps in water. I still distinctly remember the sensation of water lashing on the feet and the drowning feeling when the water recedes and your feet sink in the sand. I was terrified until I realized my parents had held me tight! 

I was at the beach of my native place Karwar, exploring the furtiveness of the sea. Since then beaches have always had an intrinsic influence the way I look at life.

I grew a little older and remember each summer holidays spending in Karwar. While building those sand castles, a flickering thought always came of building a castle on the beach and staying there forever! Yes, child fantasies! 

Creatures inside the shells always intrigued me, I wanted to know how come they are not bored dwelling there in that small space all the time. I understand it entirely now as I am a complete homely person and would rather spend the day lazing or reading at home than go out amidst everyone. 

Or was it that those shell creatures played a role in molding me like this????

Trying to catch hold of the small crabs running on the sand was almost an impossible task. But back then, you are full of energy and want to try everything. The quirky crabs used to run for their lives until they found their safe shelter. It was devilish happiness then! We never conquered the crabs though, their speed was invincible and somehow they found safety before we could pounce on them.

I think my sister, Shweta learnt a few lessons from these crabs. She is never at one place, loves to hover and be out than be at home. She is always running all the time......

Once you are in your teens, you start noticing the nature on the beach. The sunset and sunrise on the beach are the best sights one can ever experience. Seeing that ball of fire rising up the waters and then slowly melting down the waters is a plain marvel. And sitting in the sand, holding hands of your beloved and looking at the sun is an altogether different experience!!! Listening to the wave sounds with the breeze whooshing around - bliss! The serenity of the sea transmits you to another world - a world of your own thoughts, mitigates pain and gives you peace of mind!

The vastness of the sea makes me humble every time I try to see where the sea ends. You may have the power to control the world or all of world's money, but you will always be a tiny creature in front of the sea. Your power and money may not be able to save you if the sea comes down to show its power of devastation. 

The sea has taught me to keep my feet grounded!

And as I write this, it dawns to me that sea has indeed been an inseparable part of my life. I spent my childhood in Karwar, went to Andaman and Nicobar Islands for my honeymoon, was in Chennai after my marriage and now I am in Florida! The sea does have a special connection with me :)

Whenever I put my first step in water.....the memories of my childhood come gushing to me and for a while I feel at home! :)

Rachel Carson sums it up precisely - 

“To stand at the edge of the sea, to sense the ebb and flow of the tides, 

to feel the breath of a mist moving over a great salt marsh, 

to watch the flight of shore birds that have swept up and down the surf lines of the continents for untold thousands of year, 

to see the running of the old eels and the young shad to the sea, 

is to have knowledge of things that are as nearly eternal as any earthly life can be.”